Being mad

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How can you be mad at someone who has pushed you onto a new course. In the 2009 New Years wishes, everyone wants everything to be better.

Spent a day climbing up a steep rocky shifting slope and looking down and seeing how far up we were, realized, wow you could really hurt yourself, so it was time to get down and be safe about it. The big decision was down the face, go right across the boulder field or left

As I sit here assembling Ikea furniture on the first day of 2009, I realize that you can’t really talk about life X being better or life Y being better. It doesn’t matter. If you go right instead of left on a rock face, it doesn’t matter if the other side is easier what is important is you make it down the side you ended up on. It doesn’t matter who or what put you there, you are there and as one of my Buddhist friends told, me, “pay attention to the right now.”

It doesn’t matter who got you here or what mistakes you made, what matters is that you are here and eventually, we are all mortal and are going to have to get literally down.

On that same day, discovered three other people who like Hip Hop as much as me. What a surprise. So, maybe the way to start the new year is to salute Kanye West and his new album. Just love “Love Lockdown” as John says, meanful stuff 🙂 I just love it that it is just his rap and a little autobeat machine. Pure stuff. Great lyrics. (Bummer they disable embedding)

I’m not lovin’ you
Way I wanted to
What I had to do
Had to run from you
I’m in love with you
But the vibe is wrong
And that haunted me all the way home

So you never know
Never, never know
Never know enough
Til it’s over love
Til we lose control
System overload
Screamin’ no, no, no, no, no

I’m not lovin’ you
Way I wanted to
See I want to move
But can’t escape from you
So I keep it low
Keep a secret code
So everybody else don’t have to know

So keep your love locked down
Your love locked down
Keepin’ your love locked down
Your love locked down
Now keep your love locked down
Your love locked down
Now keep your love locked down
You lose

I’m not lovin’ you
Way I wanted to
I can’t keep my cool
So I keep it true
I got something to lose
So I gotta move
I can’t keep myself
And still keep you too

So I keep in mind
When I’m on my own
Somewhere far from home
In the danger zone
How many times did I tell you
‘fore it finally got through
You lose, you lose

I’m not lovin’ you
Way I wanted to
See I had to go
See I had to move
No more wasting time
You can’t wait for life
We’re just racing time
Where’s the finish line

So keep your love locked down
Your love locked down
Keepin’ your love locked down
Your love locked down
Now keep your love locked down
Your love locked down
Now keep your love locked down
You lose

I’m not lovin’ you
Way I wanted to
I bet no one knew
I got no one new
No, I said I’m through
But got love for you
But I’m not lovin’ you
Way I wanted to

Gotta keep it going
Keep the lovin’ going
Keep it on a roll
Only god knows
If I’ll be with you
Baby I’m confused
You choose, you choose

I’m not lovin’ you
Way I wanted to
Where I want to go
I don’t need you
I’ve been down this road
Too many times before
I’m not lovin’ you
Way I wanted to

So keep your love locked down
Your love locked down
Keepin’ your love locked down
Your love locked down
Now keep your love locked down
Your love locked down
Now keep your love locked down
You lose

You lose
You lose
You lose
You lose

So I don’t know if you New Year is going to be Happy or not, but I do know way or another another 365 days are going to pass one day, one hour and one minute at a time. Make the most of it. Pay attention. Be present. Be genuine. You will never have that moment again.

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