I can't believe how dependent I've gotten on two features. The first is iCloud Share Tab Groups, this gives you a single view of all your tab groups across all your devices. This is super convenient for those of us with multiple chores. Like taking care of Mom, the home, and having a non-profit and regular work job. Now you can have tabs across them all.
The real thing I was missing though is that there are still tabs that are ungrouped. These are called iCloud tabs and if you have iCloud > Safari turned on in System Preferences on the Mac and Settings on iOS or iPad then they will sync.
The problem is that I just could not find them anymore, where did they go. It turns out with the most recent release, instead of a monster long list with every machine, if you choose "+" on iPad or iOS, you will see way, way at the bottom a pull down that has a list of all the machines that are participating, you just click on select. It's a little less convenient than scrolling forever, on the other hand I have an average of 10 tabs open on each so I can see why Apple changed this.
The other small glitch is that this is on the Mac on the Start page and they allow you to change that to any URL. I've been using this to get Startpage.com (no relation but it is anonymized Google.com) to appear, but if you do this, you have no way to see all those shared tabs, so you have to change it back. I just wish startpage.com would have an extension to change it as the defaults in Safari are only for duckduckgo.com